Has your husband–or significant other–ever asked you what your secret fantasy was?
We all know what most men fantasize about so let’s just skip the details and go to the generalities.
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Men fantasize about the sex they used to have before they got married.
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Men fantasize about the sex they always wanted to have.
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Men fantasize about the sex they think every other man in the world is having except them.
Sometimes my husband tells me about his fantasies. Please see 1, 2, and 3 above.
When he asks me about my fantasies, even after all these years, he’s still hopeful. But I always disappoint.
“My fantasies,” I answer, “fitting into a size 8.”
“Looking into a mirror and seeing Hedy Lamarr’s face reflecting back at me instead of mine,” I say.

I’ve had fantasies about being on the Supreme Court and casting the deciding vote.
Sometimes I fantasize about what it would be like to be Mae West.

I have fantasies about sleeping until noon and then my maid bringing me blueberry pancakes on a beautiful tray with a red rose, and, of course, I’d be wearing a lilac pink satin & lace bed jacket like movie stars wore.

I have fantasies about dancing with Fred Astaire and Gene Kelly cutting in.
And about singing like Billie Holiday.
And singing like Joni Mitchell.
And singing like Renee Fleming.
I fantasize about being Eleanor Roosevelt but looking like Marlene Dietrich.
I have fantasies about finding out who really killed JFK, Marilyn Monroe, and JonBenet Ramsey.
But my real life has actually been more of a fantasy than any fantasy I could ever have made up.
I’ve had three good husbands (not all at the same time) and six good children (all with just one of the husbands).
I could never have fantasized all that happening to me. Especially since my Uncle Larry told me when I was 14 that nobody would ever marry me because I had buck teeth and didn’t wear my braces retainer.
When do women have time to have erotic fantasies about some Magic Mike guy, anyway?
With work, house chores, kids, meals, laundry, and their own grooming maintenance–even if it’s just washing their hair and shaving their legs–they hardly have enough time to sleep.
The truth is, I do have one really wild fantasy: that my grown children ask me for advice and then actually take it.
I don’t expect any of my fantasies will ever come true.
You’re just a button click away and I’d love to hear from you.
About your world, your family, your joys and frustrations, growing up, growing older, even recipes– even though I stopped cooking–by request–years ago.
Goodbye until next time…
Hope your day turns out as well as I hope (but doubt) mine will,
Gingy (Ilene)

What a great post! Thanks
First, I must say that you are so clever, so witty, so funny, so on target.
But you know that!!
I read your column and smile, then laugh out loud , then sometimes feel sad.
Maybe fantasies don’t come true, but they are fun to think about.
By the way if you recall, you came to our women’s luncheon (Four Seasons of Manalapan) about 8 years ago to discuss Love, Loss and What I Wore.
You were our first author and because it was so successful we have made it
an annual event, so Thank You!
Looking forward to more of your thoughts on life!
Fabulous!
Love this!
G,
Update on my Colonoscopy.
The prep cleaned me out.
My Dr was Handsome & knew what to do and put me at ease.
I have a healthy Colon.
My friend Kay who drove me and stayed with me thru this procedure gets a A++.
The sedative they gave me; gave me the longest sleep I have had in a long time.
I prayed a lot and my prayers were answered.
This was my 1st & last one. I’m 67.
Colon Cancer is a Silent Cancer.
That’s all.
Hugs!
What a terrific blog. You always make me laugh. And think.
I remember when I was in grammar school thinking I could go to the UN and tell them all to just get along, and they would listen to me because I was a child and they would listen to the wisdom of a child. That fantasy has since been replaced by a pragmatic pessimism, bordering on cynicism. My fantasies always, however, ran to the political, to Utopian societies. Sexual? Not so much. Children? Overrated, though I love them so so so much. Don’t have expectations any more. I try to enjoy each day, and hope for an old age free of physical pain.
Love you lots. Thank you. XX
Stan was right…your blog is fabulous.
You write everything I wish I wrote.
You keep getting better and better. If I didn’t love you I’d be so jealous.
Loved it!
My fantasy is to have enough money so I could work less and have time to think about my other fantasies. As you said, there is barely enough time for reality. But while I was reading what you wrote, I did fantasize that I had the ability to write witty, thoughtful things like this. Keep them coming! XO
You’re so right: No time for fantasy. Barely enough time for reality.
Consider this, though: Maybe your grown children don’t ask for your advice because you’ve already imparted your wisdom to them and they’ve absorbed it.
Mission accomplished. We don’t always know how much we’ve impacted the people around us. You, for example, have given so many of us so much. For that, many thanks! XXX
I don’t have time for fantasies…I have enough trouble dealing with every day life; but, if I did, I would be 24 years old , 5’7″ tall, outrageously beautiful, and be on the Forbes billionaire list.
love this…
love you….
love your family…..
Hugs n love,
forever and always,
Stormy Lisa
My first two fantasies are the same as Arlyne’s except I’m adding my granddaughter to #1.
My others:
3. Having my play, “Finding Mr. Rightstein” produced.
4. ” ” ” ” ” ” ” before I’m in “a home” or dead.
5. Having Chinese food with you and Stan for many, many more years.
6. ” you as a friend ” ” ” ” “
This is amazing. What a breath of fresh air, your writing always brings pure joy to me!!
P.S. – Gingy, your resourcefulness always brightens my day. XOXO
Oh, Gingy, once again you nailed it. My favorite fantasies, yes! I hope your day does turn out the way you fantasize that it will! Love, Sally
When I was younger, I used to fantasize about meeting an exceptional man who would appreciate me and my inquisitive outlook on life. I also fantasized about moving back to the wonderful neighborhood where I spent 9 idyllic years (1962-1971). At the end of my 61st year, Mr. Amazing Man showed up in my life, and we were married the next year. And guess what else? We moved into my former wonderful neighborhood and live in a house where I babysat. I’m now 70 and am still stunned how my life unfolded.
I thought of another fantasy….a very very current fantasy
I fantasize hearing a recorded robotic call voice react when i slam the phone down on the receiv
I have fantasies totally opposite in style and at the VERY same times in my life.
One is to live in a villa on a hill and sitting overlooking anything like the Isle of Capri…
the other is to live in a one room flat over a bar in Hoboken and sitting in the window looking out into the street.
I have a fantasy to lose any belly bulge.
I at the same time a have a fantasy of looking like the british tv detectvie Vera,
who if you have never seen the show a little heavy and and round and but bumpy and cozy..
Brilliant & hysterical as usual!!
I love & admire you so much!!
I miss you!
CRW
Gingy,
What a great question!
Now for my answers Ta-Da!
1. I fantasize living closer to my grandson, so I can see him grow up.
2. I fantasize that my upcoming colonosopy goes well with no problems.
3. I fantasize that we can all live in Peace & Love on our planet.
4. I fantasize that ” we as one people connected” change this world
Where our food, water, air are healthy again for all and there are no weapons of
Destruction and we live in harmony with one another.
5. I fantasize that my BFF creates a job that he is passionate about & then helps others do the same.
6. I fantasize that we all have access to Medical Cures.
7. I fantasize that there is an end to Cancer on our planet and all diseases and
That we all know how to eat and stay healthy.
8. I fantasize what I will look like if I lost 30lbs.
9. I fantasize that we get back to bartering and get rid of $.
10.I fantasize that I have a reunion with all the people in my life who helped me,
Inspired me, and cared about me thru all my ups and downs.
Thanx for this wonderful question it made me think of all the things that linger in my
Fantasy mind.
Xox
Arlyne