I always thought I had big feet. The other day I was sitting outside wearing
sandals and I looked down at my feet.  They really are big. I wish Jackie Kennedy was still First Lady. She wore a size 10 shoe. No matter who you are, you can’t hide big feet.

Shoes come in sizes. I have to say out loud to the shoe salesperson, “Do
you have this in a 10?” Even my husband doesn’t know I wear a 10. If only
that was the worst thing on my secret’s list.

That’s why I like accessories. I never have to say, “Does this earring come in a size 10?” 

Scarfs don’t come in sizes, just styles, making them the perfect accessory.
Anybody can wear any scarf. I have no anxiety asking for a large scarf.

I stay away from long scarfs, however. Isadora Duncan, the inspired, innovative, improviser and somewhat strange modern dancer, was strangled when the long scarf she was wearing became entangled in the rear wheel of the car she was driving in Nice, France. I shouldn’t worry. I’ve never been to Nice and don’t  intend to go.

I’ve always admired those women who tie a small pretty scarf on their handbag making the scarf an accessory to another accessory–a handbag.

I’m not one of those women who can drape a scarf over their shoulders and it will stay there. I think only rich women’s scarfs obey.

Do you remember Dr. Deborah Birx or has she already completed her 15 minutes of fame? She was the one who tried to tell the truth about the Covid pandemic but kept a smile on her worried face. She wore a different scarf every time she was on camera. I wondered if she just loved scarfs or had a wrinkled neck.

I love to buy scarfs. I keep them nicely folded in a drawer and never wear them.

According to sunglass connoisseurs the style of one’s sunglasses, a very important accessory, reveals one’s personality.  Now I know I can change my personality by changing my sunglasses. Whoopee, I can become a different me for under fifty bucks and give up my therapist.

The accessory I’ve always wanted most is a hat like Marlene Dietrich would wear. The kind with a veil over your eyes that seduces men. I know it’s Marlene and not the veil that seduces, but the veil also hides the bags under one’s eyes.

Pins can be a very meaningful accessory. Madeleine Albright, former Secretary of State, used pins as a diplomatic tool. Putin knew to always watch what pin Albright was wearing as a clue to her thinking. I’d hoped that if she ever met Putin again her pin would be a poisonous snake but she passed away last month.

I like pins, too, but pins cause me great anxiety.  I worry that they’ll make a hole in whatever I pin them to, and I have trouble closing the safety catch. At some point, my pin will unpin.

Like Albright, I have a pin collection. I keep buying pins but never wear them.

Another accessory I keep buying are knee socks with funky designs. They’re very affordable but very uncomfortably on my big feet. I keep them in pairs in a drawer and don’t wear them. What I don’t keep in pairs are gloves. I usually lose one glove soon after I buy them but I still keep the one I haven’t lost yet hoping to someday find its mate. I always try to be an optimist.

Whoever invented the poncho should be given The Presidential Medal of Freedom. You don’t even have to wear a bra under a poncho and that’s true freedom. What goes on under a poncho is not for public viewing. A poncho covers and hides everything awful about you.  What other accessory can claim that.

I loved my poncho but I gave it to my granddaughter when she needed one for a school play. She never returned it but she’s my granddaughter so it’s okay.

Question. Would you consider a tattoo an accessory? They’re a right of passage when you’re 16 today. When I was 16, tattoos were taboo. Only weirdos had tattoos. But when Janis Joplin got a tattoo almost every teenager wanted to be a Badass.

When my granddaughter wanted a tattoo and was doing that “But all my friends have tattoos” thing, I thought I better check the tattoo place out for germs, bugs, and weirdos. Big mistake. I got a tattoo.  When Jacqueline Susann said, “Once is not enough,” she was right. I now have five.

“Luxury designer handbags are one of the most desired accessories that every woman wants to possess.” I read that on a Google site. Why would anyone pay over $1,000 for a Lous Vuitton handbag when they could buy 6 shares of Apple stock for $1,000 or feed a hungry child in Africa for $15 a month?

The article went on to say “These handbags help you to display your style and personality in a better way. By carrying one, you can be the center of attraction, too.” I have only one thing to say about this: I am not my handbag and my handbag is not me.

You’re just a button click away and I’d love to hear from you. 

About your world, your family, your joys and frustrations,
growing up, growing older, even recipes–
even though I stopped cooking–by request–years ago.
Goodbye until next time…
Hope your day turns out as well as I hope (but doubt) mine will,
Gingy (Ilene)