I am going to confess to you something I have
never told anyone else. Something I sometimes
even lie about to myself. It all began in 1956
when I was on the Goodson-Todman television
show, “To Tell the Truth.”
Remember that show? Of course you don’t because
if you do, you’re probably as old as I am and can’t remember anything or are dead.
The shown ran for dozens of years. Bud Collyer was
the host. A panel of celebrities (in the days when
celebrities had to do something besides being a
celebrity) attempted to identify which of three guests
was telling the truth about who he or she was. One
guest was really who he or she said he or she was
and the other two guests were faking being that
person. Got it?
Well, to tell the truth, when I was a guest on “To Tell the
Truth” the four celebrities were Kitty Carlisle, Tom Poston, Polly Bergen, and Orson Bean. They were blind-folded and asked the three of us a lot of questions while a man with tortoise-shell glasses wearing an argyle sweater held up a sign that said either APPLAUSE or LAUGH from time to time.
After a few minutes, Bud Collyer said, “Will the real
Meryl Streep please stand up.” The panel took off
their blind-folds. Nobody stood up. The truth was that
the real Meryl Streep was only eleven years old in 1956
and was at home reading a Wonder Woman comic
book.
Bud had a look of complete panic on his face and I
felt so bad for him that I stood up. Then the man with
the tortoise-shell glasses and the argyle sweater held
up a sign that said APPLAUSE and the panel and the
audience clapped.
So on Tuesday, November 15, 1956, I became Meryl
Streep. The panel didn’t have a clue who the real Meryl
Streep was. Nobody did. All those accents and wigs.
So now you know that the woman with the marvelous
cheek bones, milky white skin, and angel blond hair is
really me, Ilene Beckerman, an 85 year old grandmother
from New Jersey.
I have kept my secret for many years, just like the woman who recently came out and said that when she was younger, she had an affair with Bill Clinton.
But who cares? After all, didn’t we all?
More confessions.
I also confess that I have been asked to play Lady Godiva,
Gandhi. and Moby Dick but refused because I didn’t like
their wardrobes. And I turned down playing John Bolton,
John Wayne, and John Travolta because no matter how I try, I can’t play a Republican.
Rumor has it that I got several roles by sleeping with Martin Scorsese. There is no truth in that sentence.
I slept with Steven Spielberg.
Finally, I didn’t get into Vassar because my SATs sucked.
I didn’t get in because I didn’t have a pink cashmere
sweater set or Bermuda shorts.
Since I am into telling the truth and confessing, I will also now confess, none of this is true except for the fact that I am 85 years old and presently live in New Jersey. And who I slept with is none of your business.
You’re just a button click away and I’d love
to hear from you.
About your world, your family, your joys and frustrations, growing up, growing older, even recipes– even though I stopped cooking–by request–years ago.
Goodbye until next time…
Hope your day turns outas well as I hope
(but doubt) mine will,
Gingy (Ilene)
Your ‘lies’ are fun lies.
Love you so much….Meryl or no Meryl.
I adore you, you loon! This is freaking awesome! Thanks for a much needed belly laugh. Miss your face, girl.
Please, please–no more lies!
Haven’t we heard enough from our President?
The latest one is that he has a “great” health care plan, but he can’t tell us?
Huh? He wants to trash the Affordable Care Act, but has no plan to replace it?
He’s had four years to figure it out. That’s only this week’s lie.
SORRY to bring up “real life.” FORGIVE ME–I’ll never intrude again–you’re sooo good at helping us take our minds off the bad stuff.
XX E.
p.s. A few of those things above, I do believe–that you’ve been a Streep impersonator (you could pass!) and that you slept with Spielberger. I know it’s true.
It’s telling me I already said this, but I don’t see it. If I did, please delete.
I always think that Meryl Streep would play me in the movie about my life, funny how we both glommed onto her. But really it would be Barbara Streisand playing me (in profile) with Fran Drescher’s voice. They all have good politics. Wait, I guess I don’t know what Fran’s politics are. I just researched her and found out that she went to Queens College briefly, but quit when she found out that all the acting classes were filled. Then she went to cosmetology school. What does all this have to do with your blog? Nothing. What can I say, you bring it out in me. Love you. You rule.
I always think that Meryl Streep would play me in the movie about my life, funny how we both glommed onto her. But really it would be Barbara Streisand playing me (in profile) with Fran Drescher’s voice. They all have good politics. Wait, I guess I don’t know what Fran’s politics are. I just researched her and found out that she went to Queens College briefly, but quit when she found out that all the acting classes were filled. Then she went to cosmetology school. What does all this have to do with your blog? Nothing. What can I say, you bring it out in me. Love you. You rule.
I am not surprised, I known for years that you are Meryl Streep.
I am so glad that you pretend to be Ilene Beckerman.
It is no surprise to me, I’ve known for years that you are Meryl Streep.
I am so glad pretend to be Ilene Beckerman.
It is no surprise to me, I’ve known for years that you are Meryl Streep.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxooxoxxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Well Meryl it is no secret to me, I’ve known for years that you are Meryl Streep.
xoxoxo
Today is my birthday. I was born in 1936 in Atlanta. Someone gave me Love, Loss, and What I Wore. I wrote my first book at 80. Girdled and Gloved: From Radio to YouTube. I majored in drama. I have movie star photos in my room at a Retirement Village. I draw Not very good sketches in my journal, sometimes putting them into a YouTube video. I Compose not very good music. I wrote a not very good musical, Silent Dreams. Google Charlotte Chip Ashurst McDaniel On YouTube. I have 30 not very good videos.
Wish I could respond to every comment but don’t have computer capability. Bobbye, yes I had an iridescent brocade Chinese dress I wore to a New Year’s Eve
party in Cambridge. Wish I had the dress–not the husband. He was kissing somebody else at midnight.
Bless you all, good luck, good times. XO
It’s me, Gingy/Ilene,
Wish I could answer every comment individually but don’t have that computer capability. But Bobbye–oh I had an iridescent brocade Chinese dress I wore to a New Year’s Eve party in Cambridge. Wish I still had the dress–not the husband. He was kissing somebody else at midnight.
Bless you all–good health, good luck, good times. xo
Hi Ilene my first time posting here. I like reading about your fashion choices over the years. I was wondering if you remember a short craze in 1955 for Asian dresses due to the popularity of what Jennifer Jones wore in “Love is a Many Splendored Thing.” I had a lovely turquoise & deep green dress with a sleeveless overcoat. I loved wearing it but, alas, I don’t have a photo of it. I wonder what became of that dress? Did you buy into the craze and do you have a photo? Would love to see it.
Bobbye
hi Ilene, You’ll always be Meryl to me and I thank you for this clever and diverting blog. Keep on keeping on. You give so many of us so much pleasure.
BTW, I’m trying to resuscitate my “Seven Deadly Sins,” stories and prints project. Best
Sara
Hi Gingi,
You keep making me laugh and wonder about the world, your world, my world. Please keep on keeping on!
Love, Sally
P.S. Sometimes I wish I were a robot!
To Tell the Truth, this is terrific. I love it. I love all your blogs and all of you.
Thank you, thank you, thank you,
XXXX Nancy
I must confess that just now is the first time I’ve read your blog aloud to my husband, and he laughed the whole time. He loved everything, Gingy! And yes, we remember all of the panelists on TO TELL THE TRUTH.
This post brought me such smiles (as all your posts do). I love the uniqueness and realness behind each and every one of your posts! Thanks for the wonderful laughs. Already cannot wait for your next post!
A laugh riot, to tell the truth!
You totally crack me up. Of course, being a ancient grandmother myself means that all the things you allude to I get. Who hasn’t marveled at Meryl Streep’s perfection while looking for a top big enough to hide the bulges or didn’t daydream lustfully about Bill Clinton? Not so much now…
My SATS sucked too.