This month’s blog is written by my granddaughter Emma about her mother (my daughter Isabelle).

Isabelle and Emma

My mother died of breast cancer when I was 13. I’m 17 now.  I miss her every day. She never told me she had cancer.  She wanted to protect me. I knew she had Multiple Sclerosis and I thought her pain was mostly because of the MS. My father died shortly after. I kept, and still keep, my sadness to myself. I used to be a child but I realize that now I am responsible for myself, for my own future and I want my parents to be proud of me.

When I was 13 I noticed my mom’s hair started to fall out. I was a smart child but she used to hide everything from me. I knew what cancer was but she never told me and I never asked. I guess we were both scared. I don’t remember the exact day but my oldest sister got a phone call at 4 a.m. and it was the phone call no one ever wants to get–my mother had passed in the hospital in the middle of the night. I remember hiding under my blanket and I had no words. It is still painful to me every day. Now I am 17 and a day doesn’t go by where I do not miss her. Though time does help heal, it never changes the fact she is gone.

My biggest supports are my sisters, Allie and Olivia. They do everything for me and they took over the “mother” role. Some say they were put on this planet to fit this role. I believe it. They gave up their twenties to be there for me. I never know how I can thank them.

As I reflect on the past couple of years, my outlook has tremendously changed. If I could go back, I would have spent more time with my parents and really have gotten to know them more. My motto is to live each day as if it was your last and do things that scare you. I know this is a cliché but I truly believe it. We are never guaranteed tomorrow.

Be thankful for what you do have.  I am thankful for my sisters and for all those who have impacted on my life. I thank you all for sticking by me. I thank the world for another day.

My advice to other children going through something similar to what I went through is to let them know that they are not alone. I am here for you and there are plenty of people who are here for you. Do not be afraid to cry, yell, or scream. It is okay to show emotion. It is okay to cry four times a day. Live each day how you want to live it but do not blame yourself for anything that happened. You can only do the best you can do. It is not fair when your parents get sick and you may feel helpless. Just know things will be okay. You will be strong and you will get through this. I did. I am Emma Edelman and I am a survivor in my own way. My tragedies do not define me and your hard times won’t either. They will leave battle wounds and scars but keep your head up and push forward. Remember you are not alone. I am here.